This is getting really quite tiresome. The stuff that people expect me to live with and not complain about or not be broken down by is just getting ridiculous. Sorry to break it to you humanity, but i am not made of steel. Both my work and my personal life are clashing and making it infinitely more difficult more me to live. Im so tired from work that i cant walk, and my personal life just seems to be crumbling. I have to time for fun anymore. Im getting way to stressed about certain aspects of my life that its just making things so much more difficult. And on top of that school starts in basically a week. Thats not going to help either. Im just so tired and dont have energy to accomplish anything anymore. And the people around me arent helping what so ever. Im not a person who doesnt feel anything and made of steel. People dont seem to understand that just because i choose not to show emotion to people i dont like or dont trust, doesnt mean that im unfeelings. That just means that late at night by myself, everything comes out in one way or another. Be it throwing things, swearing, or crying it stills comes out. I just wish that people would take a second to view from my "lens" on how this is affecting me. The only plus side to all of this is my therapy is apparently free. So guess whos got 2 thumbs and seeing a Councillor soon? This guy. Its always nice to think back and know that im clinically depressed and should be taking anti-depressants. But eh, im way to bad with pills so i just make do without.
I just hope that when i see someone to hopefully relieve this load thats constantly on my back, that ill start feeling better and grow as a person. Since as of right now im just growing tired, angry and resentful to the world and MOST of the people in it. I just thank the very few friends that i have. Shelby for one who has been such a great friend aand helping me get through this and vent to her. Allie and Allison (you know who you are lovies ;D ) who i know are always there for me and willing to give me hugs (virtual though they may be) and laughs when i need it the most. You guys are awesome and so glad you are willing to be my crutches when im so emotionally crippled right now :D
-Re
I just hope that when i see someone to hopefully relieve this load thats constantly on my back, that ill start feeling better and grow as a person. Since as of right now im just growing tired, angry and resentful to the world and MOST of the people in it. I just thank the very few friends that i have. Shelby for one who has been such a great friend aand helping me get through this and vent to her. Allie and Allison (you know who you are lovies ;D ) who i know are always there for me and willing to give me hugs (virtual though they may be) and laughs when i need it the most. You guys are awesome and so glad you are willing to be my crutches when im so emotionally crippled right now :D
-Re
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